Why There Are Couples Who Argue A Lot And Stay Together
Yes, there are couples who argue but are still together. How is this possible following the canons idealized by the society of love? Keep reading!
Why are there couples who argue a lot? Fighting in a relationship is usually something routine and that happens to some couples on a day-to-day basis. If in some cases the dispute is between two, in others those around them are involved.
Couples who argue a lot but who, despite this, are still together usually draw attention. For what is this? How do you maintain a relationship based on constant dispute? In this article we will tell you about it.
Why are there couples who argue a lot?
This is the first question that must be answered before understanding that there are couples who argue a lot, but are still together. Although no two relationships are the same and the issues that generate fights can be diverse, the main reasons are:
1. Money
No matter how much you have or how much you spend, money is often one of the culprits for fights in a relationship. And it is that the conflict for financial reasons can be based on the priorities of each one.
In addition, the National Council of Family Relations explains that economic problems are capable of generating stress and susceptibilities that increase discussions. Therefore, it is best to assume that in a relationship you must be generous and learn to share with your partner.
2. Jealousy, one of the reasons why couples argue a lot
Jealous people can create an unpleasant situation anytime or anywhere, no matter who’s next to you. This reason for fighting is common, but it should not be so common; since according to researcher Jorge Humberto Vanegas Osorio jealousy implies control towards the other person.
It is difficult to assume that a partner can become possessive, but you have to be aware of one thing: no one should control or feel jealous about getting close to other people, or discovering new social environments.
If in a couple jealousy is the main reason for discussion, you should reconsider staying with that person because it can affect you. Either you try to overcome this problem together, or it is best to go to therapy to try to find an effective solution if you want to continue the relationship.
3 sons
The upbringing, care, education, feeding and future of children also lead to discussion. If you have them, you may understand that there are times when there is no clear decision about a specific thing. And this gives rise to the occasional dispute.
However, the most important thing is that both of you work as a team when it comes to raising a child.
4. Future
Plans as a couple, whether it’s next weekend or in a few years, can cause disputes. The vacations, the wedding or the moves are conflicting subjects in more than one relationship.
But, to end the fights on this subject, we advise you that when planning a trip you try to enjoy the process and see it as something fun.
In the event that thinking about the future goes beyond a simple vacation, take it easy; since the most important thing is the present. What you are living today. In addition, making decisions about the future is something that will come.
5. Housework
Until a few decades ago, women were the ones who used to do the housework on their own. This fact is still happening but, fortunately, more and more couples do the same housework or divide the work.
In this way, society advances to end the gender roles imposed on women.
Now that this seems to have finally changed, there are times when housework is a conflict. When, in fact, an investigation carried out by the Society for the Psychological Study of Social Affairs details that it is best that you work as a team and manage to make cleaning something fun.
Couples who argue a lot are capable of being happy
People sometimes face unpleasant situations and it is in moments of uncertainty, frustration, anger, or fear that arguments come up. In the specific case of couple relationships, fights break out when someone thinks that the direction is losing.
This means that conflicts serve to keep things from getting worse. Yes, this is how you read it. While one of the two seeks that the relationship does not fail, it is when there are more fights. Therefore, arguing avoids losing control of the situation.
They also appear when you have to face the unknown, something new or different. Couples argue to feel in control and not helpless in the face of threats.
Fight from dialogue and respect
Care must be taken to argue ‘for sport’ or for disputes to increase in intensity and frequency; as this can damage the relationship and become dangerous.
In fact, a study published in 2013 by the Journal of Family Psychology states that it is okay not to agree on everything and that you may disagree on some occasions. But as long as the arguments do not become constant and neither of the two wants to dominate the other, or even feel the desire to attack the other person verbally or physically.
The best fights are those that are made with respect and with the aim of reaching a common decision. Without malice and without any other type of motivation other than that of agreeing between both of them on a specific issue.
